No need to shroud his (hopefully better-considered) second marriage in secrecy.

You may receive a few calls from folks who are curious about the first wife, and they may receive a few gifts.

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And we don’t want to look as if we’re hinting for gifts.

We just don’t want people to be surprised when his new wife turns up.

As it progressed, I heard more from his wife, whom I didn’t know, than from him. You mention that there was no romantic cast to your friendship, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t confide intimately in him over the years.

Frequently, she wrote things I would have preferred not to know, but I think it helped her having someone to confide in. She should have returned the letters or destroyed them.

My go-to was always “Sense and Sensibility” (the Emma Thompson version, please).

Honor your feelings of loss, but don’t try to scotch your ex’s new thing.

Is it appropriate to send a wedding announcement to close friends and family?

It’s awkward because some of them don’t know he divorced.

For almost 40 years, I kept in touch with a college friend through letters. ) There was no romantic overtone to our friendship.

A few years ago, he wrote that he had a terminal illness.

His first wedding, in 2014, was a blowout destination affair for 120 guests.