Look it over and be as honest with them as you were with yourself in order to write it.This person should be willing to point out such things as “You never return calls” or “You boss people around instead of partnering with them,” so that you’ll be able to see yourself clearly and get past the denial.

am still single dating advice-68

These insecurities may spill over into your larger worry of why you are still single.

However, whether or not your eyes are blue is not a reason for your singlehood-such things are beyond our control.

If you’ve been asked out and turned everyone down, never left your house except to go to work, rarely tried to appear appealing and approachable, never looked anyone in the eyes and smiled, not given the time of day or initiated a conversation with anyone, then sure…you may indeed be responsible. However, being single for more than two or three years, like I have, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s your “fault.” There are probably a number of contributing factors which has led to your singleness, but there is no need wasting time figuring who’s to blame.

Some things are uncontrollable, especially in regards to dating, the actions of others, and God’s will. When it comes to relationships (or non-relationships), we need to take some action as we are “waiting on the Lord.” What I mean is if you truly want to be in a relationship, you need to do something about it….discover what God blesses.

Look past the superficial and really think about the negative behaviors you have been unwilling to see because you don’t want to see them. Make a list of the things you think are holding you back. Get a Second Opinion It’s time to bring in the reinforcements. (No, not your mom, because she, of course, thinks you are perfect.) Choose a friend or a counselor who will talk to you candidly and in a straightforward manner.

Ask them to take some time and sit with you to discuss your list.

If you have a tendency to be rude or don’t let people get a word in, try to take a backseat in the conversation, keep your negative thoughts to yourself, and let others speak.

If you are aggressive and full of pressure tactics, like calling someone repeatedly, try slowing down and being patient.

Denial at its root may be a defense mechanism to spare ourselves what we don’t want to see or hear.